The Amazing Race to Dinner
My plan today was to drive to College Station in the morning. There is only one reason to go to College Station, and that is if you are sure that you have no choice. It seemed that on this day, CBS was holding an open casting call for The Amazing Race. Now, I will flat out tell anyone I know that getting on this show would be a big old heaping of rainbow flavored cotton candy. Not because I care about being on television, but because the adventure and opportunity that show would provide could not be duplicated.
So, off I go to College Station, application in hand and MP3 player blaring some sweet old school Rick Springfield. When I arrive at the very trendy mall where the casting call is taking place, there is already a line. Not a big one, but enough to make you sigh. Never to be diverted by a queue, I settle in for the wait, until… Yes, there is always an until. The rep for the local CBS station came by and said that all they were conducting was videotape presentations, which would be sent to CBS for consideration. Hell, I can do that myself. So, I left the queue, but my hopes for being on the show remain as I gather the remaining flotsam the network wonks are requiring of me so provide.
Feeling a bit peckish at this point, I decide it is time to eat. So, of course, I went to Houston. See, when your diet is almost exclusively carnivorous, the variety afforded to you is surprisingly slim. But in Houston, I knew of a mecca. A nirvana of carnivorous pleasure. And I knew I had to go. Plus, it was only another hour and a half or so.
Almost instinctively, I cut through the ridiculous amount of traffic and women wearing clothes with some sort of sparkly stuff on them, and found my way to Fogo de Chao. Oh my god, if ever there was a land where animals dread and meat eater’s desire, Fogo de Chao is it. A Brazilian steakhouse, they literally put a plate in front of you and parade all manner of meats before you to sample as much and as often as you wish. Both bacon wrapped and unwrapped varieties abounded as I plowed my way through the animal kingdom without reservation or concern. Only until I got to the point of meat-based exhaustion did I relent to finally saying enough.
Waddling to the car, I staved off the beef coma until I finally arrived back in Austin, full of protein and memories of a fun little day trip. And hope for television glory to come.
Keeping that in mind, and in my willingness to share that which no one has asked for, I thought you might like to see the answers to some of my Amazing Race Application questions. Feel free to judge me. Everyone else does.
What famous person reminds you of yourself?
- Will Ferrell’ and Ben Stiller’s Love Child
What most excites you about traveling?
- What doesn’t? It’s what I want to do with my life.
What is your opinion of foreigners?
- That is a stupid question. Foreign to whom? If you mean non-Americans, I have no opinion. I take people at face value.
What country and place would you most like to visit and why?
- Many of the countries of Africa. It has a timeless culture and is just now emerging in many respects. The culture is so completely different than America that is needs to be experienced and learned from.
What part of the world is the least interesting and why?
- I honestly can’t think of one. They are all fascinating and have something to teach me.
List the three adjectives that best describe you:
- Enthusiastic
- Creative
- Laid back
What is the accomplishment that you are most proud of?
- Assuming I am successful, what I am doing now in following my bliss and starting a second career. On second thought, success is irrelevant.
Describe your perfect day:
- Picking my backpack off of the sandy floor of the grass hut I have been staying in on a beach on a South Pacific island, and making my way to a rickety bus to catch a plane to a new destination I have never been to, where everything and everyone is a new experience.
How do you blow off steam?
- Bounce hard at loud rock shows, go to the movies, yoga
What is your favorite topic of conversation at a dinner party? What topics are off limits?
- I will talk about anything without fear or filter. Unfortunately, I don’t have any tact. But I do love to hear other peoples point of view.
What sports, hobbies, or special skills do you have?*
- Film, racquetball, tennis, Ashtanga Yoga, writing, I can juggle and I make a mean spaghetti.
*I wanted to say I have bow staff skills, nunchuck skills, computer hacking skills, but it wouldn't be true and they may not have gotten the reference.
So, off I go to College Station, application in hand and MP3 player blaring some sweet old school Rick Springfield. When I arrive at the very trendy mall where the casting call is taking place, there is already a line. Not a big one, but enough to make you sigh. Never to be diverted by a queue, I settle in for the wait, until… Yes, there is always an until. The rep for the local CBS station came by and said that all they were conducting was videotape presentations, which would be sent to CBS for consideration. Hell, I can do that myself. So, I left the queue, but my hopes for being on the show remain as I gather the remaining flotsam the network wonks are requiring of me so provide.
Feeling a bit peckish at this point, I decide it is time to eat. So, of course, I went to Houston. See, when your diet is almost exclusively carnivorous, the variety afforded to you is surprisingly slim. But in Houston, I knew of a mecca. A nirvana of carnivorous pleasure. And I knew I had to go. Plus, it was only another hour and a half or so.
Almost instinctively, I cut through the ridiculous amount of traffic and women wearing clothes with some sort of sparkly stuff on them, and found my way to Fogo de Chao. Oh my god, if ever there was a land where animals dread and meat eater’s desire, Fogo de Chao is it. A Brazilian steakhouse, they literally put a plate in front of you and parade all manner of meats before you to sample as much and as often as you wish. Both bacon wrapped and unwrapped varieties abounded as I plowed my way through the animal kingdom without reservation or concern. Only until I got to the point of meat-based exhaustion did I relent to finally saying enough.
Waddling to the car, I staved off the beef coma until I finally arrived back in Austin, full of protein and memories of a fun little day trip. And hope for television glory to come.
Keeping that in mind, and in my willingness to share that which no one has asked for, I thought you might like to see the answers to some of my Amazing Race Application questions. Feel free to judge me. Everyone else does.
What famous person reminds you of yourself?
- Will Ferrell’ and Ben Stiller’s Love Child
What most excites you about traveling?
- What doesn’t? It’s what I want to do with my life.
What is your opinion of foreigners?
- That is a stupid question. Foreign to whom? If you mean non-Americans, I have no opinion. I take people at face value.
What country and place would you most like to visit and why?
- Many of the countries of Africa. It has a timeless culture and is just now emerging in many respects. The culture is so completely different than America that is needs to be experienced and learned from.
What part of the world is the least interesting and why?
- I honestly can’t think of one. They are all fascinating and have something to teach me.
List the three adjectives that best describe you:
- Enthusiastic
- Creative
- Laid back
What is the accomplishment that you are most proud of?
- Assuming I am successful, what I am doing now in following my bliss and starting a second career. On second thought, success is irrelevant.
Describe your perfect day:
- Picking my backpack off of the sandy floor of the grass hut I have been staying in on a beach on a South Pacific island, and making my way to a rickety bus to catch a plane to a new destination I have never been to, where everything and everyone is a new experience.
How do you blow off steam?
- Bounce hard at loud rock shows, go to the movies, yoga
What is your favorite topic of conversation at a dinner party? What topics are off limits?
- I will talk about anything without fear or filter. Unfortunately, I don’t have any tact. But I do love to hear other peoples point of view.
What sports, hobbies, or special skills do you have?*
- Film, racquetball, tennis, Ashtanga Yoga, writing, I can juggle and I make a mean spaghetti.
*I wanted to say I have bow staff skills, nunchuck skills, computer hacking skills, but it wouldn't be true and they may not have gotten the reference.
3 Comments:
Gotta love a carnivore. Especially one that can juggle. If I were a judge, I'd pick you!
Oof. As a former blogger who also auditioned for Amazing Race... with another blogger as my partner... I can tell you that publicly posting about it if you are truly hopeful is a bad deal. They take that confidentiality agreement REALLY seriously. Anyway, rock on, love the Fogo, love TAR, love your blog.
Thanks for the props Tracy. Yeah, I was interviewed for Big Brother once and they were insane about the confidentiality. Needless to say, should TAR call me, no one will know about it. Fingers crossed.
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